Wednesday, March 10, 2010

His Word Wednesday

Tough lessons, walking through the valley, rough spots, hard times, whatever you call it; we all go through them.  Every individual goes through different hard times.  There was this girl when I was in college and her difficult spot was making a B in one or more of her graduate classes when she was extremely used to making A's.  This may not sound like a struggle or valley for you or I but it was for her.  For others its the death of a loved one, still others it's the spouse that walks away from the marriage and the kids, for yet others its _________ (fill in the blank).  Bubba and I have 2 major areas in our lives where, if we let it, life would kick our tail.  Satan would win and we would become ineffective in the Kingdom of God.  One of them I will not speak on as it affects more than just the 2 of us but the second is our struggle with infertility.  There isn't a real reason why we aren't pregnant, at least not one that modern medicine can give us.  After 6+ years of seeking answers, a myriad of medical tests, surgery, etc. the world has no answers for us.  There are a few paths left that we could walk down however one of them goes against everything we believe in (invitro).  One of the other paths, unless Bubba says, "We are going to do this", I know I don't feel led to go that route (insemination).  The final path, which we support this ministry with our time and money, is not one that either of us feels led to pursue (adoption).   In spite of our overwhelming desire to be parents the desire to be obedient to our Heavenly Father outweighs everything else.  There are folks in our shoes who will stop at nothing in order to be pregnant or have a child through adoption, that is their path and we have no condemnation for those folks.  We know how all consuming the road of infertility can be.  The heartache, month after month after month.  Watching those around you pop out babies as though there was no end in sight, we know.  We know the deep, deep, down cry of "Why, God, why?!?" in the midnight hour.
I know, for me, there came a point where I had to decide, maybe it's because I had lost my focus or maybe God was just bringing me to the end of me, whether or not I was going to continue to walk with my Savior and Lord.  Would I follow Him even if we never have children and the other situation continued on?  Would I still believe that He is a God of miracles and that He hasn't abandoned me?  Would I believe that God knows what is best for me, much better than I do?  Are you there?  Do you ask those questions?
I made the decision that life walking with Christ and without children was far better than life walking against Christ and with children.  It took me a while to get to that point but I did get there.  I am reminded, constantly, that "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" Romans 8:28.  All things means the good, the bad, and the ugly.  So, even though I don't see the good in the 2 dominate situations in our lives right now, I know that God is working in them and through them to mold me into the person He wants me to be.  He is pruning me and it hurts, "He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful" John 15:2.
Someone I know sent me an excerpt from Pastor Manly Beasely's workbook on faith:
"When God wants to reveal His sufficiency in our lives in a particular area, He allows a need to arise in that area.  In reality it is the person of Christ Jesus Himself that is the supply for our every need.  As a matter of fact, God’s real objective in our lives is for us to discover Christ as our total supply or sufficiency.  So needs indicate to us not only God’s plan or will but His Person, the person of Jesus Christ."
My need is to rely on Him daily as we walk through this valley in our lives.  As the storms rip at the boat of our lives, I will focus on Him.  I will be obedient to Him.  I WILL love Him even when things don't go the way I had hoped and prayed they would.  My need is HIM.

Have you turned to Him in your life storms?  Have you turned and thanked Him for the good things in your life?  Has there ever been a point when you surrendered your life to Him completely?  Don't let our circumstances fool you, Bubba and I are forever grateful for the ultimate sacrifice that Jesus paid for us on the cross of Calvary.  We wouldn't trade our day of salvation in for ANYTHING!  Do you hear Him calling your name? 

Standing on His promises,
Mrs. Bubba

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